Today is an opportunity for our finest hour, or to take another step closer to societal demise.
Something as simple and inexpensive as listening may lead us to a working answer. It has often been said that “Listening is the first step to understanding.” Most people (regardless of their views) long to be understood. Economist Allen Greenspan described the need for understanding:“I know you think you understand what you thought I said, but I am not sure you realize that what you heard is not what I said.”
“Colombo,” one of the most famous detective television shows of all times, featured a non-stereotypical cop, actor Peter Falk. Columbo wore a rumpled raincoat, asked lots of questions, related personal experiences, showed respect for
everyone, and somehow solved the crime.
Asking Questions… Relating Personal Experiences, Showing Respect = Solutions
Columbo’s humble and curious approach (“I was just wondering and then listening”) is a formula that can solve problems, mend broken relationships and bridge divisions.
As a society and nation, we certainly have experienced our differences in the 160 years following the Civil War. Rarely, if ever, have we been this divided. The disagreements within families, neighborhoods, houses of faith, places of employment, educational and government circles are well documented.
Growing “A Culture of Listening”
Dr. Aleta Borrud, a retired physician and political candidate, participates in Rochester’s new listening project. The vision is to “explore listening which leads to an understanding that develops meaningful relationships in our community.” Dr. Borrud coined a phrase that aptly describes the project’s mission of growing a culture of listening. Specific steps of action are being developed to accomplish the mission and vision:
A “Do and Then Teach” series of listening sessions centers around meaningful questions that usually merit thoughtful answers. Twenty to thirty participants spend ninety minutes developing, practicing and expanding their listening skills. Listeners are then encouraged to have similar discussions with people in their sphere of influence.
Some of the topics include:
- Positive and productive “elephant in the room” discussions
- Listening makes dollars and sense
- Responding to difficult and obnoxious people
- Sounds of silence
- Respect: Bridging the racial divide
Another topic, “Inspiring Stories…Yours and Mine,” is a remarkable tool for genuinely getting to know someone better. Life lessons learned in the school of hard knocks have been shared in safe, natural and non-threatening environments.
Friends have deepened existing friendships, and strangers have begun new friendships.
Within two years, the plan is to have up to twenty-five monthly discussion groups led by community, business, faith, non-profit and educational leaders in a wide variety of settings.
“Culture of Listening” includes the usage of media and social media. The Rochester Post Bulletin features a quarterly WRAP (four pages of resources on listening to 24,000 households). Additional media partnerships and involvement with social media will follow. P-3 is a listening project designed to intentionally grow committed listeners who model their listening skills and use their influence. P-3 encourages listening multiplication through four friends (you and three others) to practice and expand listening within family, workplace, neighborhood, faith community and other settings. The goal is six months of participation, followed by intentional replication with three additional friends each six months for three years.
You are invited to participate in helping grow a culture of listening that leads to understanding and builds significant relationships. Paul Larson, the owner of Ed-Venture Travel and project co-coordinator, uses a quote by author Dean Jackson to summarize our knowledge of listening:
“Listening is an art that requires attention over talent, spirit over ego, others over self.”
Growing a Culture of Listening is a collaborative effort spearheaded by the National Community Resource Center located in Rochester. The author is NCRC’s founder/president and leads the Listening Initiative. To get involved in growing a Culture of Listening, contact us via phone at 507-254-1254.
Ancient Elephant Parable of Six Blind Men
